From jmurtari at AKidsRight.org Wed Dec 6 09:57:05 2006 From: jmurtari at AKidsRight.org (John Murtari) Date: Wed, 6 Dec 2006 09:57:05 -0500 Subject: [AKidsRight.Org] Syracuse Rally Plans / Preparing for the Advent of Reform Message-ID: <17782.55873.34347.245510@hammer.thebook.com> Good People & People of Faith, It's nice to be able to type this myself! I was released from jail last Friday and have been busy playing catch up both at home and work. I've said this before, but my sincere appreciation for the efforts of so many people on my behalf -- I'm so very fortunate to be in good health after an experience that could have had serious consequences. Many, many thanks! My special thanks to Teri Stoddard (tstoddard at AKidsRight.Org) and Jane Spies (jspies at AKidsRight.Org) who did a great job with news releases and getting the media interested. Kevin Purdy (kpurdy at AKidsRight.Org) helped manage a flood of email. All helped me with good personal advice as situations changed. Thanks also to those who contributed to the effort: Legal Defense: http://www.AKidsRight.Org/donation_log_jm.htm Media/Other: http://www.AKidsRight.Org/donation_log.htm Every bit was welcome and if you contributed your name should be there -- please let us know if it was missed! I tried to write a personal letter to every contributor. We all have our own financial burdens to deal with, your sacrifices were a great help! Upcoming Plans -------------- I really want to hear from you on some plans we have for a rally in Syracuse that will focus on getting a front-running Presidential candidate, Senator Hillary Clinton, to meet with parents. Please review the details in the following list messages: http://www.AKidsRight.Org/archive/archive2006/0047.html -- What's our next focus? http://www.AKidsRight.Org/archive/archive2006/0049.html -- Rally plans? http://www.AKidsRight.Org/archive/archive2006/0052.html -- Letter to Sen. Clinton. http://www.AKidsRight.Org/civil_rights_essay.htm -- Our Civil Rights Let me know what you think about these plans, if you would travel to such an event, and if you live in the Central New York area - could you help in organizing and hosting the rally? Your FEEDBACK will be shared with the others in the group. Preparing for the Advent of Reform ---------------------------------- I almost didn't want to put this in the message. Tomorrow I have plane tickets to fly out west so I can be with my son, Domenic, for the weekend, It is something we are both looking forward to. About a week later he'll be flying here to spend the Christmas Holiday with me, Dec 21st - 30th. How fortunate we both are & with thanks to you! More than any other time of the year, Christmas can drive a knife into the gut of any parent separated from their child. Forgive the 'graphic' description, but if you have been there -- how else can you describe the pain, depression, frustration and anger. It can be twisted further when alienation has taken place and your kids don't want to see you for the holidays -- even as adults! As a spiritual director told me years ago when I asked them how I should feel about a difficult situation, "John, you are suppose to feel the way you feel. The only real question is, how are you going to act in response to those feelings?" The site documents what happened to me recently: http://www.AKidsRight.Org/support_jm.htm (blog) http://www.AKidsRIght.Org/paper.htm (media coverage) Many people think these efforts helped others and may have an impact on bringing reform closer. I never (or almost never) spoke out in anger, or ridiculed a former spouse, Judge, or lawyer. If I had 'impact', it was not because I talked about 'them' and the 'bad' THEY did -- it was because I talked about the pain I felt and the great LOVE I had for my child and the love you have for yours. As Christmas approaches, I'm reviewing my thoughts and actions as I prepare to celebrate the birth of Jesus of Nazareth, the human being, who was just like us, who was not treated fairly and suffered, but still believed in the power of love to bring change to himself and others: http://www.AKidsRight.Org/civil_back.htm It gives me hope in the what the future can bring if we only try our best. We are getting closer to the advent of real reform! -- John Murtari ____________________________________________________________________ Coordinator AKidsRight.Org jmurtari at AKidsRight.Org "A Kid's Right to BOTH parents" Toll Free (877) 635-1968(x-211) http://www.AKidsRight.Org/ From jmurtari at AKidsRight.org Mon Dec 25 12:08:26 2006 From: jmurtari at AKidsRight.org (John Murtari) Date: Mon, 25 Dec 2006 12:08:26 -0500 Subject: [AKidsRight.Org] Merry Christmas and a Happy Holidays -- even if it's not fair! Message-ID: <17808.1418.299240.53892@hammer.thebook.com> Good People & People of Faith, My best wishes for a very Merry Christmas and a Happy Holiday Season! Please understand that our group is not just about the Christian Faith, or that it is the ONLY faith -- but for most of us these traditions have strong meanings. My apologies for falling behind in answering your emails. I hope to get everything caught up by early January and that we can begin to execute some plans for making reform a national issue: http://www.AKidsRIght.Org/archive/archive2006/0053.html Perhaps this Holiday season can give us time to reflect on what it takes to make reform happen. Does one key to our success lie in our faith & willingness to sacrifice? What stops us? Can we work to make reform a reality for our children and for others? Here are a few thoughts and maybe we should look in a mirror first - as always, your FEEDBACK is welcome. NOTE: Sometimes a lot of this stuff sounds like pie in the sky theory. It certainly was not theory for me when I was refusing to eat & drink voluntarily until they fed me in jail. As I grew weaker and lay in bed, I had plenty of time to reflect on some hard reality - "John, if these guys don't give you fluids you could lose your kidneys. How does dialysis for the rest of your life sound? Worth it? Of course, maybe your heart will just stop. Are you sure you want to keep this up? Will it matter? Is it worth it? How much faith do you have?" Fortunately, I didn't have to find out how far I was willing to go thanks to the efforts and prayers of many of you! It's not FAIR! -------------- It's Christmas morning as I type this and I'm alone in the house. My son Domenic is not here, his flights were delayed by the big Denver blizzard -- not fair! I pick him up at the airport tonight. A former spouse or social worker has deprived you of any contact with your children for Christmas -- not Fair! You have grown children that were so alienated during childhood that they want no part of you during the holidays -- not FAIR! In the jail hospital ward I met a man who was infected with HIV while a teenager from a sex-partner who didn't care. The doctor delivered the death sentence to him at 18. He could expect a life of 15-20 years. His time is now running out. He has full blown AIDS and expects to die, alone, in a prison -- Not FAIR! Any of us, at our next check-up, could hear (and may have already heard), from the Doctor, "Sorry, we found something on a lab test, looks like a very malignant Cancer" -- NOT FAIR! If there really was this 'loving God', how could he allow all these things to happen! NOT AT ALL FAIR! I once read a line in a novel that really stuck with me, "even the angels look to Earth and sigh (for the chance to experience the uncertainty and joys of physical life?) ..." Do you know there are people who are absolutely color blind? Who live life with the view of a black & white TV. Could you explain to them what the color red is? Would you be willing to undergo a painful medical procedure for the 'chance' to see life in color? Would you put the child you love through such a procedure? Proof for the existence of an almighty God, hardly. I read a recent article about a book by scientists 'proving' there is no God -- hardly. It's all about faith. Who's on the Team / Can we just all get along? --------------------------------------------- One large obstacle to public action is a lack of sense of "team" or "union." Right now we are just a bunch of individuals nursing our own pain first, and not really willing to make sacrifice (and experience more pain) for the sake of: * Those crazy Father's Rights groups... * Those crazy Women's Rights groups... * Those crazy collections of accused child abusers...yuck! Some of the Men can't even stand to look at a scene of Mother and Child happily together without some anger -- b$%tch! And we're sure many Women have experienced the same after seeing their child "taken" by their former husband... creeps! Come on, admit it you Men, deep down, you KNOW you'd be the best parent! After all, who's the big bad hunter-gatherer! Ladies, that child came out of YOUR body -- their YOURS, after all possession is nine tenths of the law! We're talking a biological reality here! Please, step back and remember the words on which our Country was founded, "...all men are created equal." That is biological, psychological, and social nonsense. We are very "unequal." The real message is what, "we have a right to be treated equally." To the Founders of this Nation, we were all children of the same God, deserving of the same opportunities. In the spiritual measure (the only real measure), we are equal and society is at its best when it acknowledges that. A prayer for Family Rights --------------------------- Almighty and ever-living God, hear our prayer for justice. Give us the courage and Faith we need to meet the challenges of reform. Help all people recognize the rights of parents to be secure and treated equally in their ability to love their children. Inspire us to follow your example of divine love not only for our children, but for all our brothers and sisters. Amen. Hanging on to Hatred? -------------------- There is some truth that sometimes you have to let go of hatred before you can be effective for change. Here is an old time reading from a book of Wisdom. Even if we don't believe, does it ring true? Can we still think of an 'ex', social worker, or judge -- as neighbor? --------------- Sirach 27:30 Wrath and anger are hateful things, but the sinner hugs them tight. The vengeful will suffer the Lord's vengeance for he remembers their sins in detail. Forgive your neighbor's injustice; then when you pray, your own sins will be forgiven. Could anyone nourish anger against another and expect healing from the Lord? Could anyone refuse mercy to another like himself, can he seek pardon for his own sins? If one who is but flesh cherishes wrath, who will forgive your sins? Remember your last days, set enmity aside; remember death and decay, and cease from sin! Think of the commandments, hate not your neighbor; remember the Most High's covenant, and overlook faults. Best wishes for a Merry Christmas and a Happy Holiday season! -- John Murtari ____________________________________________________________________ Coordinator AKidsRight.Org jmurtari at AKidsRight.Org "A Kid's Right to BOTH parents" Toll Free (877) 635-1968(x-211) http://www.AKidsRight.Org/